the Mind’s Chew Toy

I had heard about Taking Lives a little bit a couple of months ago when it hit theaters, but never got around to checking it out. It looked to be a decent thriller, and starred Angelina Jolie, Kiefer Sutherland and Ethan Hawke.

While I’ve never been a big fan of Ethan’s (c’mon people, let’s agree: Before Sunrise SUCKED), Kiefer Sutherland has been a hot item lately because of his TV show “24,” and Angelina Jolie is always pretty good (I still have a soft spot for her after her turn in Gone In 60 Seconds (2000). A girl who likes cars - what can be wrong with that? Plus, it was a heck of a good movie.)

So, would these three get together and produce a thriller worth watching, or would this just be another wannabe Silence of the Lambs?

Angelina Jolie does a decent job here, but doesn’t really have much to act on. This is the first movie I can remember seeing where she bares her breasts - maybe she supposed doing that would help the movie, since they didn’t really give her enough to act with (Okay, I know that I just sold half the guys that are reading this into going to rent the film. Trust me guys, it’s a lot to have to sit through before that. But I guess that’s what scene selection is for, right?).

Ethan Hawke (as usual) sucks, but not as much as we’re used to, so I guess you’d have to call it a decent Hawke showing. Kiefer Sutherland isn’t really in the movie much, so doesn’t get a chance to do much with his newly rediscovered acting abilities - or maybe his small screen performance doesn’t translate quite as well to the big screen anymore. Whichever way it is, he’s not around enough to prove or disprove anything anyway. The other characters all do a decent job with what they are given as well. Unfortunately for all of them (and us viewers), they aren’t given much to work with at all.

The plot is paper-thin. All the hidden surprises are pretty much right out in the open, and one would be hard-pressed to be surprised at almost anything that happens in the film. That predictability leads to a rather boring viewing by the audience, since it doesn’t really give us much to look forward to.

It’s like starting a book by reading the Cliff Notes® version first. You’ve already got all of the plot points pointed out, so you aren’t as interested in finding out how they get there. If they were to surprise you, it would catch your attention that much quicker, but unfortunately, this movie never really does.

The characters are so cardboard-like, I can’t for the life of me remember the names of any of the others. Obviously they don’t leave a lasting impression at all. And you can’t really blame the actors for that, can you? Without a well-thought out plot, the actors try to put up a good front, put you can’t keep a good front up for an entire film length - eventually the viewer is going to get a glimpse behind the front, and realize there’s nothing there.

The special effects are pretty well done. There are a few expectedly grisly scenes, and the effects come off looking pretty good. It’s just too bad a few dead bodies do not make a film. If that was the case, this film would have had it made. As it is, it’s sad to know that the dead bodies are given as much help in their roles as the actors are - not much.

It started out with a good plot, added some famous names, and then turned it’s back on all of it and became junk. Seemingly wandering wherever it feels like with little or no concern with building characters and relating them to the audience (or trying to create any sort of tension), the film meanders along it’s incredibly long-seeming journey to a place you’ll probably recognize: Predicability Central.

Basically, Taking Lives does just that - it steals a piece of your life that you won’t ever get back. The most suprising thing about this film is why Angelina, Kiefer and Ethan (okay not Ethan - he wouldn’t know a good movie if he saw one) all joined up for this snore-able thriller.

Let’s just hope the book wasn’t this bad.