By
Reid on
August 14th, 2007 (Updated December 23, 2007). Filed under RAW.
- Mr. McMahon comes out to a ring surrounded by Superstars from RAW, SmackDown and ECW. He says he refuses to be intimidated by the US Congress, the IRS or this recent paternity suit. He says nothing can bother him any more…and then Stephanie’s music hits. Stephanie tells Mr. McMahon that after he faked his own death and caused so much pain and suffering for his family, she has no guilt about saying that - according to the attorney - Mr. McMahon’s illegitimate child is a WWE Superstar - and is standing outside the ring right now. Searching the faces around the ring, Mr. McMahon slowly makes his way backstage.
- In a taped interview last week, Lashley talks about his surgery and the attack by Mr. Kennedy, before footage of his surgey is shown.
- Mr. Kennedy def. The Sandman
- Backstage, Mr. McMahon tells Coach what a shock it is to know his illegitimate child is on the WWE roster. Trying to narrow things down, Coach gets Mr. McMahon to admit he was “active” when he was “almost a teenager”. Coach sighs, saying it could really be anyone on the roster…and Ric Flair comes in with his trademark “Woo!” as Mr. McMahon looks heavenward.
- William Regal, preparing for “WWE Idol” later tonight, listens to JBL and Michael Cole’s horrible rendition of Hall & Oates’ “Private Eyes” for only a few lines before saying they can’t be on “Idol”. Maria and Ron Simmons show up, and Regal asks Maria to be a judge on tonight’s “Idol” before saying that their date is next week. Santino shows up, saying they can’t go on a date because Maria is his girlfriend. When Regal says Ron Simmons won the “WWE Dating Game” fair and square, Santino asks if he can be on “Idol” to wow Maria with his talent. Regal says no and Santino storms off, Maria trailing in his wake. Ron Simmons walks over to JBL and Michael Cole, and they ask him who his favorite 80’s band was. His answer: “Wham!”
- Cryme Tyme comes out and auctions off Lillian Garcia’s chair from under her, signing it and selling to a fan.
- Lance Cade & Trevor Murdoch def. Cryme Tyme by DQ after Shad attacks with a chair after a double-team by Lance Cade & Trevor Murdoch behind the ref’s back
- Snitsky def. Robby of The Highlanders
- Snitsky goes to continue the attack on Robby after the match, but Rory intervenes, and Snitsky beats him up instead.
- Backstage, Coach asks Mr. McMahon to give him a list of his “indescretions” and by Saturday Night’s Main Event 08.18.07, he should have it narrowed down to which WWE Superstar is his illegitimate child. Cody Rhodes shows up, assures Mr. McMahon he knows who his dad is, gives Mr. McMahon a condom, saying he thinks Mr. McMahon needs it more than he does. The Boogeyman shows up, and starts chainting the lyrics to “Cats in the Cradle”, with Coach commenting that The Boogeyman has Mr. McMahon’s eyes.
- Todd Grisham introduces the judges for “WWE Idol”: William Regal, Maria and Mick Foley. First contestant: Jillian Hall, with Mick Foley commenting for the first time he’s happy he got his right ear torn off. Conestant #2: Howard Finkel, Nikolai Volkov and The Iron Sheik, with Nikolai Volkov singing The Soviet National Anthem. The Iron Sheik starts yelling unintelligibly at William Regal until security escorts them to the back. Contestant #3: Lillian Garcia, who starts singing “New York New York” until Santino interrupts to start singing “That’s Amore” to Maria. Santino tells Maria it’s time to go, but Maria says she’s still judging. Ron Simmons comes out, and after Santino insults and pushes him, Ron throws Santino into the wall. William Regal announces that was “music” to his ears and announces Ron Simmons as the winner.
- Cody Rhodes def. Charlie Haas
- King Booker comes to the ring for the official “Coronation” by Jerry Lawler. Jerry comes into the ring and says he will not put the crown on King Booker’s head, because Booker isn’t the only king - and at SummerSlam, Booker will have to face “the King of Kings”, Triple H. Lawler stomps on Booker’s crown and attacks Booker, but Sharmell jumps on Lawler’s back, allowing Booker to knock Lawler out of the ring, where Booker throws Lawler into the stairs before hitting him with a TV monitor.
- Todd Grisham comes out to join JR at the announcers’ table while EMTs check on Lawler backstage.
- Randy Orton comes out to say that John Cena is the longest reigning WWE Champion in 2 decades…but in 2 weeks, Cena’s fairytale comes to an end. and nothing will stop him.
- John Cena & Umaga def. Carlito & Randy Orton in a Tag Team Match.
- Mr. McMahon bloats over some of his “exploits” with Coach, until Coach motions for him to be quiet. Mr. McMahon turns - and sees Linda McMahon, who tells him as of this moment, he has no home.
Tagged With
Leave a Reply